"Cult of B.O.B." is the sixth episode of Daniel Kravitz, Chosen One (Volume 3), and the thirty-second installment of the series overall. It was performed on October 12, 2019 at MadLab theatre in Columbus, OH as the second segment of Show LII. It was released as podcast episode 258.
Written by Nick Arganbright and Jerome Wetzel
Directed by Dallas Ray
Previous episode: "Jant Braidley"
Next episode: "Punch"
The Story[]
This episode begins before the intro. It's a dark night in the woods, and two hooded figures meet in secrecy. One, Fran, asks the other, Jerry, if he has secured a place for the ceremony. Jerry confirms that the spot is far enough away to go unnoticed, but close enough to 'him' for the spell to work. Jerry used Google maps to confirm this, finding only a couple of people and occasionally a horse at the location, and noted their patrol paths. Fran thinks that makes sense, but presses Jerry if he's sure. Jerry admits the locator spells they've tried are no longer working, but when they were, 'he' was there. Fran says they'll load the bus in the morning, but Jerry had better be right if they haul their butts all the way out there.
Then, then into. Rufus Reginald Rochester mentions Abby Reynolds and Grezit the Green are away on an assignment, which is a surprise to Daniel Kravitz. Despite being first brought up the intro, this conflict carries through to the story itself as canon knowledge.
The plot proper begins late the next evening in the U.L.P. Research and Development building, which is home to a massive computer bank with many screens called The Oracle. It has been enhanced with magic by Alfredo to allow the tracking of spells performed. Rufus and Alexis Augustus Armentrout are debating how to set up the new equipment, looking at the manual and trying to increase the program they're running's sensitivity without losing too many filters. Sitting with his feet on the desk, bored and warning the pair that Dawn Vaughn (also on the assignment) is going to kill them for messing with her toys, is Daniel. They protest that contacts all over the world are ready to start reporting in, and they can't wait any longer. Alexis also accuses Daniel of taking out his annoyance at Abby (see the intro) on them.
Josh Wallace has entered, unnoticed at first, to empty the trash. Daniel comments that he looks like crap, and he says he hasn't been sleeping well lately.
Alexis brings up that they have a new lead on Yiddish texts, which excites Rufus, who says Yiddish magic is very powerful and complicated. Alexis also mentions activity happening in The Subworlds. Daniel says he doesn't care about The Subworlds, hoping the monsters will all stay there, or maybe even die so he can retire. Alexis is greatly offended, stating genocide is never the answer, and not all monsters are bad. Before his former mentors can pester him further, Daniel takes Josh to check on Alfredo and his work on the recovered magical portals.
On the way, Josh tells Daniel that he doesn't feel like part of the group anymore, reduced to emptying trash and going on supply runs. Daniel says Josh is really good at that stuff, and besides, they don't know what to do with him now that he doesn't have magic. Daniel suggests Josh find a way to contribute more, but doesn't offer any ideas on how to make that happen.
Alfredo greets them and says Josh looks like crap. The sorcerer says the portal magic is a type he doesn't understand so he hasn't gotten very far. It is not technology. Daniel slips and tells the two that his ancient Chosen One powers wear him out if he uses them too much.
Rufus and Alexis run in and tell them there's an intrusion at the edge of the property. Daniel sends Josh to fetch Pee Wee and the other four head to confront their unannounced visitors.
At the edge of the ranch, about a dozen robed figures gather around a cauldron. Fran, the leader, calls for a sacrifice to be brought forward. Jerry admits the woman they kidnapped to serve that purpose kicked fellow acolyte Carter in the balls and ran off. Fran is furious. They need a live sacrifice, and they came all the way out here. She has Carter grab Jerry, then Fran runs Jerry through with a sword and tosses him in the cauldron so she can continue the spell.
It is at this point that Daniel and friends arrive. Alexis quickly recognizes the robes as belonging to the Cult of B.O.B. Rufus adds that this group has been fooling around with souls, stating magic can restore a body that has been destroyed if the soul resides elsewhere. But it's a two-step process that requires a significant amount of time between parts.
Josh enters and Carter says he looks like crap. Daniel and Rufus quickly shout at Josh to leave, but it's too late. A ghostly male image, formless and colorful, comes out of the cauldron and enters his chest. The cult celebrates, with Fran telling Daniel that his friend hadn't been in Josh in some time. While Alfredo tries to reverse the spell, the cult drop their relics and flees to their bus. Daniel, Alexis, and Rufus stop them, with Daniel putting Pee Wee through the engine. Fran calls for 'Master' Josh to help, but he just stands there, confused. It quickly becomes apparent they can't kill them, nor turn them over to the authorities without risking the cult members telling people what is going on at the ranch. So they will have to keep the cult members prisoner themselves.
Later that night, Daniel, Rufus, Alexis, and Alfredo ponder what to do. Alfredo couldn't reverse anything, and they all wonder if Josh is now fully Bertram Oswalt Babbit, something they'd clearly suspected might happen for awhile, and the Cult of Bertram showing up made it more likely. They'd just been watching him to see if he might give away his game. However, they don't have proof of this, and 'Josh' is denying it. What's more, he's done nothing suspicious and been a contributing member of the team for over a year, and they don't really know what would happen to a person between the two parts of the spell, so even if he was trustworthy before, he might not be now. Daniel vows to keep 'Josh' locked up until they figure this out.
Guest Starring[]
- Keith Jackson as Alfredo
- Katie Boissoneault as Fran
- Dallas Ray as Jerry
- Jerome Wetzel as Carter
Trivia[]
- The original draft was written solely by Nick, but Jerome did extensive reworking including removing Josh dream subplot and reworking the way the cult is shown, and so shares story credit.